Through a child’s eyes

It has been years since the idea of Christmas has said anything to me other than “oh god.  Insanity!”  I guess I lost the excitement when I was about 15, and that’s a lot of years.  I see families starting to get ready for the holiday earlier and earlier each year.  It wouldn’t surprise me to see a summer barbecue / Christmas tree decorating party in the middle of August. Continued… It all gets so spread out, and blurred compared to that of my youth.  Decorating the tree on Christmas Eve, no presents until dad got home from church.  But I have had an awakening in the past six years. Continued…

My son says; “Daddy, can we get a tree, can we decorate, can we sing carols, come on Daddy, It is Jesus’ birthday!.”  I see the excitement, the anticipation, the joy.  I can’t look into his eyes with the same lethargic attitude that I’ve developed over my lifetime.  His enthusiasm for the true meaning of Christmas forces the joy into my heart. 

Merry Christmas to you all.  May that children's joy, that we can all find if we look hard enough, fill your holiday season.

The Games We Play

I sit here and write and try to remember the times that we played.  There is one that stands out, but there were many.    It was hard not to find things to do when you had this big church in the back yard.  There were always the war games that took place throughout the church grounds.  Hordes of children with plastic guns shouting “I got you!  You’re dead!” “No you didn’t!  You missed!” as we ran through the church.  We were always careful to check first to see if there were any parishioners praying.  You have to understand that the policy of the Church of the Holy Spirit was to remain open 24 – 7.  Anyone could enter any building at any time.  That policy worked out very well for my brother Chris and me. 

But it wasn’t just the inside of the church that was our playground.  The church owned quite a lot of land.  There were hills and valleys, fields and swamps.  But by far the most exciting, and the most restricted, was the roof of the guild hall.  It was a very large flat roof, covered with pebbles, which even a small child could simply step onto from the parking lot area.  The handfuls of pebbles became hand grenades which showered all of us when we were below.  The plumbing vent pipes were always fun to drop those same handfuls down.  God only knows why the plumbing system worked with the vast amount of pebble deposits we made into it.

One sunny summer day Chris and I were on the roof.  We always had to keep an eye out for a stray adult.  I got the idea first I think.  Let’s jump off!  There was a hill on the left side of the roof.  The gap between the hill and the roof didn’t seem like it was that big.  We could do it.  But which one of us was going first?  “Come on Chris, you jump, and I’ll wait for you on the hill.”  That didn’t go over too well.  As my brother matured, his fear of just about everything seemed to fade away, but we hadn’t come to that point yet.  “No way” was the answer.  So I had to be the first to go.

I don’t know why I thought that it would be a good idea to jump off of that roof.  To this day I still can’t figure out the motivation.  I guess it was new, it was exciting, it was stupid.  That was enough for a 12 year old kid.  And here’s another thing.  Why am I still alive?  It was a long way down from that child accessible roof.  Why wasn’t there a fence or something to keep kids off of it?  Why was it such a tempting place that was so easy to get on?  Why did they build it that way anyway?

Well those were the excuses that I tried on my mother after Chris ran to get her, just after my incredibly stupid leap of faith.  Your first sprained ankle really hurts.  I was extremely lucky that that was all that I had at that point, but you’re not thinking in that direction while you are rolling on the grass in incredible pain.  What really bit the big one was that I didn’t even get crutches.  I think the doctor said to himself “no crutches for this idiot.  Let him suffer.”  It was a little embarrassing having to explain the outcome of my foolishness.  “I jumped off a roof” was always followed by “what an idiot”.  It didn’t even turn out to be a cool injury like breaking your leg skiing, or breaking your arm riding a bike.  “I sprained my ankle jumping off a roof had only idiocy associated with it.

When I look back on that incident, it has become a metaphor for my life.  How many roofs have I jumped off since then.  I can think of a couple, but that is another story which I care not to share at this point in time.  I guess that the answer is, there is always a roof waiting to be jumped off of, and how we deal with the temptation is what separates out the idiots.  I failed miserably on the first one.

Through a child’s eyes

It has been years since the idea of Christmas has said anything to me other than “oh god.  Insanity!”  I guess I lost the excitement when I was about 15, and that’s a lot of years.  I see families starting to get ready for the holiday earlier and earlier each year.  It wouldn’t surprise me to see a summer barbecue / Christmas tree decorating party in the middle of August. It all gets so spread out, and blurred compared to that of my youth.  Decorating the tree on Christmas Eve, no presents until dad got home from church.  But I have had an awakening in the past six years.

My son says; “Daddy, can we get a tree, can we decorate, can we sing carols, come on Daddy, It is Jesus’ birthday!.”  I see the excitement, the anticipation, the joy.  I can’t look into his eyes with the same lethargic attitude that I’ve developed over my lifetime.  His enthusiasm for the true meaning of Christmas forces the joy into my heart. 

Squirtguns in the Choir 2

The Church of the Holy Spirit in Orleans MA. was more than a place for our family to worship.  It was more than a place for my father to work.  It was a playground for a couple of kids who lived next door.  The backyard of the church was our baseball field, the grounds of the church were our hiding places, the interior of the church was our place to explore.  We did have a little church etiquette though.  Whenever we ran through the sanctuary, we always stopped to bow in front of the cross, then continued to zoom through to the other side.  Sometimes we didn't actually stop, we bowed while in high gear because we were usually chasing another kid and couldn't take the time to stop. 

By the time that Chris and I were teenagers, we knew every inch of that place.  We even knew about areas that only the original builders of the church knew.  Because the policy of the church was to stay open twenty four-seven, we were able to get into any area we wanted, except the offices.  The offices.  For two young boys who knew every inch of this church, it was very frustrating not knowing the ins and outs of the office building.  

We were about twelve and ten when we finally found it.  The key to our curiosity.  A hatch.  There was an attic hatch.  Could this be the big payoff?  We boosted each other up to see where it lead.  Sure enough, it went over the offices.  We were very excited.  My brother and I had not had allot of experience climbing through attics without floors.  We weren't up on the knowledge that staying on the ceiling joists was the way to go.  It was much more comfortable anyway climbing on that pink fluffy stuff.  And then it happened.  Boom!  Crash!  Chris's foot went right though the ceiling.  It was pretty obvious at that point that a hasty retreat was in order. 

But now what do we do?  There is a large hole in the ceiling of the new office complex.  Chris and I were usually in trouble.  The biggest reason for that is that I couldn't keep my mouth shut.  We made a pact that "we didn't know anything".  Then came dinner.  It was torture.  I was sweating at the table.  We had to tell.  I looked over at Chris and asked; " should we tell them?"  "NO" was my answer, but at that point it was too late.  "Tell us what?" asked dad.  I found out, in later years, that my parents were in hysterics for about an hour after they took the time to set up our punishment.  Carl Johnson was the handyman at the church.  He fixed the ceiling, we raked his yard, for two days.  That may be the reason that, to this day, I hate raking.

My River

I was waxing poetic after the first song, and came up with this.

My River

I’m sitting here outside my home

Wonderin’ where my life will roam

I’m  older now and options seem

To dry up like a summer stream

I have my dreams like young ones do

But they seem dry and far from view

Yet they’re my dreams and I’ll still try

To give them all the wings to fly

Chorus:

Don’t keep me down

Don’t hold me back

Let me swim in

The rivers track

Give me the strength

To carry on

Flow with the current

Sure and strong

Don’t let that river

 Pass me by

Give all my dream

The wings to fly.

Each day I walk the trail of life

Each step is lead with hope and strife

It’s funny that the way we go

Can all be changed by rain or snow

The blast of power rain can give

The calming cold of snow shall live

inside my heart as I go on

through  all my trials I’ll be strong

to face my dreams and push them through

to give them wings like young ones do

Chorus

Bridge:

The River of life flows through my veins

I feel it with the summer rains

The drops fall on my face and hands

They guide me through my life’s demands

And when the rain drops fade and go

My life’s renewed with flakes of snow

That cold soft kiss as snowflakes glance

Make my soul leap like rapids dance

Now that I’m older some might say

That all my dreams should fade away

Liked dried up leaves in desert sands

But I can’t follow their demands

The Streams of life fill me with hope

My goals are still within my scope

Don’t tell me that it’s far too late

Don’t fill my cup with fear and hate

For in my heart I’m young I’m strong

The river of life pulls me along.

Chorus

Don't Let My Torch Fade

 This is a song that I wrote the lyrics to.  My close friend Sarah Burrill Put it to music

The light of life is in my hand.

I’ve always had to take a stand

For those that no one else could see

that they have needs like you and me.

I’ve paid my dues,   I’ve hit each wall,

Because I’ve always had the call

To help the poor, help those in need

with righteousness  and fairness feed

the ones we always overlook

whose lives we always close the book.

Refrain

Don’t let my torch fade

Don’t let my torch fade out

Don’t let my torch fade

Don’t lie in fear and doubt

Please let my love in

You know we all can win

With hope and dreams for all

So every man stands tall

Don’t let my torch fade

I walk the road. I’m strong. I’m brave.

At times I feel I’m in a cave

With walls that close on me so tight,

But that is when I find the light.

For beacons lead us from despair

And guide us to the open air.

They pull me to the righteous way.

They guide me, but at times I stray.

Yet when I need to help a friend

my light and love come in the end.

Refrain

My children and my wife you see

Are those that matter most to me.

My love for them will never fade,

For bricks of love my life has laid

A sure foundation of our love

That’s guided by our god above.

His hand I hold with love and fear

as those approaching days grow near.

For I shall leave this land I love

And trust in him, my god above.

Refrain

As my torch fades with evenings light

My dreams and burdens far from sight

My love pours out to those below

for with that love I do bestow

my dreams for love throughout my home.

My love throughout their lives will roam.

Yet for my dreams for life for all,

It’s time that others heed my call

For love and peace throughout the land

when we all help our fellow man.

Refrain

I wrote this with my brother’s love.

For my best friend who’s now above

With God to lead him on his way.

But for my brother I must say

As each and every sun appears

That light from you will guide my years.

I’ll do my best to be your friend

And guide your loves right to the end.

I love you more than you could know

I’m just so sad you had to go.

Refrain

One Voice

When things really piss me off, I write. 

 

One Voice

 

Ok, so I get why people would think that it's inappropriate to have a mosque across the street from ground zero (even though it is not actually across the street). I'm not sure how I feel about it either, considering one of my best friends was killed that day in Windows on the World. But here's the thing, didn't we form our country based on certain principals? Isn't freedom of religion one of those principals that men and women have given their lives for, for the past 200 plus years? I would never burn a flag, but I would fight for your right to do so. I’m not Islamic, but I am a Christian, and an American.  As such, I understand that others can, and do, have other forms of worship that I should respect.  To me this sounds simple, but because someone practices the Islamic faith, doesn't mean that he or she is a terrorist. I haven’t read the whole thing, but I’m fairly certain that Mohammad doesn’t call for cowardly terrorist attacks against innocent people anywhere in the Koran.  I have a hard time believing that many people out there are giving that idea much more than lip service.  Our unfounded fear of peaceful Islamic citizens is just that, unfounded.

It is easy to stand on your beliefs, but not so easy to defend the beliefs of those you don't agree with. If our country was guided only by individual moral judgment, the first one in line against the Mosque should be the JEWISH mayor of NYC, but he is one of the brave people defending the rights of the mosque.  He is also brave enough to defend the rights of this maniac minister in Florida.  I agree, he has the right to burn the Koran, but he is doing this solely out of a religious bias and hatred. His disrespect and irresponsible behavior may end up causing the good men and women of our armed services, as well as thousands of Americans living in Islamic nations to become even more vulnerable to extremist groups.  I realize that he has the right of free speech as an American, but does he have this same right as a Christian?  Jesus said “love thy neighbor” “turn the other cheek”, but I don’t recall anything about disrespect thy neighbor and burn their holy books.  Vengeance is mine sayeth the Lord.

The attack on 911 was more than the actual horrific event. It was an attack to instill fear. Is our fear of something we don't understand, or believe in, enough to drive us away from the principals our country
was based on? "The home of the brave" is sung across our country each day, but what does that mean if we can only show our courage when it is comfortable.  Our worst fears should be directed toward some of our politicians, our so called leaders, sworn to uphold the constitution, who seem like they haven't read it yet. Ignorance is bliss. Their influence on the masses is what I fear more than another terrorist attack. They'll tell you anything that you want to hear to gain your support. Irresponsible rhetoric aimed at instilling more hatred and fear seems to be the word of the day.  The hypocrisy in statements made recently by our so called leaders , or former leaders who are able to get the ear of the media in order to bolster their movements, regarding the Mosque and the burning of the Koran, are repugnant to the rational responsible citizens of this country.

I feel that it is time that the good people of this country take our country back.   This type of behavior by our leaders is un-American. It is essential that we form a NONPOLITICAL party that is there to stand up for what is right. A party run by the people, for the people, not for the career politicians and lawyers.  Live by the constitution, don’t basterdize it.  A party where people can share new ideas not be told what to think.  Stand up for all Americans, the weak as well as the strong.  Allow the good people from other countries, looking to live here, to become contributing members of our society.  That, by the way, is how our country was formed; otherwise we would all be NATIVE Americans.  My family came here on ships from England and Sweden.  It was a long time ago, but they were immigrants.  Pay fair taxes for all.  Pay good teachers more than CEOs. (I am not a teacher, but I understand their value)  Penalize those who crowd our courts with frivolous law suits.(they do in England)  Offer jobs to our citizens before we shuffle them off to foreign countries, and penalize those companies that continue to practice this in order to avoid fair and decent wages. Define once and for all what is fair trade versus what is right.  Find our true values, the ones that our country was formed around, and live by them.  For unless we take back our country, our children will not have the values that we should all truly cherish, and the future of our beloved country will be dim at best.

My little brother, my best friend, my hero, was killed earlier this year.  My little brother lived his life by these values that I have discussed.  He was a humble giant whom I looked up to for his judgment and his character.  Not only I, but all of the branches of government in the State of Delaware, the Vice President of the United States, and the United States Congress showed their respect for his efforts to make this a better world.  My brother tried every day to change this world one person at a time.  Our President was elected because the majority of us wanted change.  The only way that I can see true change coming is if we all change one person at a time.  Be proud to give your seat to an older person, don’t do it out of guilt.  Do something nice for someone because you want to, not because you have to.  Hold the door for another, and then look behind you to see if anyone else is coming, because it is the right thing to do.  Count to ten before you blast your horn.  Smile at strangers, don’t start it off with a dirty look.  Keep it simple at first, it will grow with time.  I am certainly not perfect, not even close, but I try to be a better person every day.  Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn’t.  I want my little brother to be proud of his big brother, the same way I am of him and his legacy. “Take a look at yourself and make that change”.  Show our children what it is supposed to be.  Words are cheap.

George White (A patriotic American citizen brave enough to do the right thing and stand up for other citizens rights)